These are the foundations for tearing down any wall that surrounds you, and freeing yourself to endless possibilities in all aspects of your life: Be the constructor of your life, make a plan. Educate your mind with accredited self-help articles, books... Motivate yourself with positive quotes... Do not hesitate nor be afraid to ask for help-to accept help. Nurture your emotions, make time to rest and relax when you can. Give yourself time to heal like you would a broken bone, the flu... Reward, treat yourself, even if just once in awhile; but do it! Build confidence; look in the mirror daily and learn to truly love your reflection, love you; you are worth it. Do NOT judge time or any set backs. Simply enjoy your small progresses, the tiny cracks in your walls; for the door is on the other side of many doors you will and can, eventually; open in your life. Remember to remember, throughout life; your mind, your heart, your spirit, your mental wellbeing...every part of you is a muscle needing motivation, exercise, or knowledge. Go on now; build those muscles and start tearing those walls down and opening doors of opportunities in your life, for this is YOUR LIFE! ~ndpthepoetress, Michelle Culp of Humanities IDEAS
A short, comprehensive essay by Jeane Michelle Culp (ndpthepoetress)
And so I did, until I had to no more. ~ndpthepoetress
Self-talk, what the heck does that even mean. I can't just say, things will be okay; things will get better. Heck, my inner child knows better than that kind of talk; passive dismissive. Myself and I are joined at the hip, together toward a downward spiral, of rapidly losing all hope. 'Til one day; I heard my usual negative thoughts about myself, over and over; again and again. Then suddenly, like a long unanswered prayer; an unfamiliar self voice, from deep within the crevices of my mind, shouted; STOP, that is not me. I am not that way. I know how, who I am. I am a kind, caring, considerate,... person. It was at that moment, I truly understood what self-talk is. I had to stand up for me, myself, and I. Because; I had unwittingly, become my own worst critic. My thoughts were bullying me like my abusers had, and only I could save us from the bullies. And so my journey began; until the day I do not have to any more.
Like a scene out of 1Shuffle, (though admittedly, I've only started watching 30 minutes of that movie.) I could see the various ages in my life, passing before my eyes. And with each tear, I could feel every time I was abused.
So today; I burn the echoes of quotes about 'what you see in others is a reflection of yourself'; and 'you are what you attract'. Rather the reflection and attraction are from a vicious cycle, that unbeknownst; I had been attracting and tolerating. The same behavior from my past abusers, was now being extended by other people, who knew exactly how to demean me, by using my vulnerability against me.
Perhaps attraction really does exist, however; I wouldn't go as far as the seemingly cultish, "The Law Of Attraction". But if you can attract; I was no longer going to hold up a mirror for vindictive, abusive people to continue the cycle of abuse. As if giving myself ammunition to confirm my abusers browbeating words of I am no good, I am worthless, I'll never amount to anything, I don't deserve any better... NO more. I want to attract people who see the good in me, the small part in me that I know truly still does exist, despite the understandably, to somewhat of a degree; bitter person I'd become over the years.
Today the real self-talk begins for the betterment. Today I no longer will 'let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet' and trample my soul.
And so; let your self-talk begin. Start with NO. No I am not this, no I am not that way, No I am not ____, No I am not ____,... NO more negativity.
Instead; say to yourself: I am ____, I am ____, I am ____... (accentuate the positive).
In the process; may you start attracting that which clears your cloudy eyes. May instead, you start seeing through stained glassed windows of positive possibilities, that reflect healing light upon your inner child. And may you continue upon this new journey of encouraging self-talk in your life, until you need not any more.
Don't wait for your life to flash before your eyes, go on and love yourself today. Break the cycle!
"This above all- to thine own self be true" -Hamlet, Act I, Scene 3
Wizardry
Steven Michael
Misery loves company well not me though
Ya I'm good all alone I'd rather not manage your ego
All you do is complain and gossip about other people
Man I ain't judging but you ain't gone be doing that shit around me no no
That's not the vibe on this side we stay elevated
We smile through the pain overcome thank God and then we celebrate it
Our meditation our medication
Our peace of mind is something sacred
We empathize but don't have the patience
For negativity and hating
Ya it's all love and I'm saying
I'll send you my love while I'm praying
But right now I'm focused on me and my team and our goals
And these dues that we're paying
So dude stop playing and don't be confused
Your issues ain't what really makes you miserable
You can miss me with that misery
Words are magic and I'm dodging all the wizardry
All the pettiness I won't let it get to me
Ain't nobody walking through my mind with their dirty feet
You can miss me with that misery
It's all love but I'm protective of my energy
All the pettiness I won't let it get to me
Ain't nobody walking through my mind with their dirty feet
Don't get me wrong we all suffer
And while we're here we need to love one another
If you're in pain or in need I've got you covered
What I'm talking bout is all the toxic clutter
Used to be a head case
Had to get my head straight
I did the work it took some time but finally cleared my head space
Now my mind clean that's feng shui
Done paying mind to what some say
I'm dodging vibes I'm unfazed
I'm going up that's one way
No I do not have the time if your energy ain't matching mine
Me and the team a mastermind with blinders on we're on our grind
Ya we show love and improvement
We'd rather make moves than excuses
Misfortune isn't exclusive
We just decided to do it
So sorry not sorry I've got to be selfish
Won't let my thoughts be effected
By limiting views or another's perception
Your limitations are your misconceptions
I'm focused on light and selecting
To believe in my life not projections
That are rooted in fear I gotta stay clear til all of my truth manifested
You can miss me with that misery
Words are magic and I'm dodging all the wizardry
All the pettiness I won't let it get to me
Ain't nobody walking through my mind with their dirty feet
You can miss me with that misery
It's all love but I'm protective of my energy
All the pettiness I won't let it get to me
Ain't nobody walking through my mind with their dirty feet
1Movie: Shuffle ("Desperate to solve the mystery behind his wife's death, Lovell Milo (TJ Thyne, from the T.V. Series "Bones") is trapped living his life out of order. He is forced to piece together clues while waking up every day at a different age, on a different day of his life." (Release date : August 21, 2012
Actors : T.J. Thyne, Paula Rhodes, Tamara Taylor...)
Christmas Movie, Tis The Season When reformed convict Korey Carpenter is hired as head youth pastor, he has no idea how close his past is to catching up with him. With the camp deadline looming, can Korey and the kids come up with enough Christmas magic to make ends meet?
Filmed at the beautiful American Fork Community Presbyterian Church; 'where the 1984 movie Footloose, filmed most of the movie's church scenes'. Director Bennie Parker Featuring original songs written by Bennie Parker Songs produced by Dirk Parker Starring Seth Goldklang, Whitney Lang, Dylan Love, Henry Moyle... Genres: Faith and Spirituality, Arts, Entertainment, and Culture, Music
From Been Jammin' INC., Bennie Parker's heart to yours; enjoy! Mixed and mastered the official soundtrack for the motion picture by Dirk Parker!
*Featuring original songs written by Bennie Parker!
💕🎶 Tis The Season - Movie (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack) is OUT on ALL STREAMING PLATFORMS 🔥🎬 Please give it a listen and share with your friends and family! It’s full of great Christmas songs that will be sure to warm your heart! ❤️
ndpthepoetress:My 'personal action' is to continue to promote the IDEAS®: Inclusion Diversity Equality Acceptance Solidarity for ALL by saving Humanities 1 Human at a Time, 1 Book, 1 Poem, 1 Quote, 1 Song... at a Time. Join us on Facebook STOP and: S.ee T.he O.ther P.eople.
In my opinion, whether because of ones health, accent, lifestyle, color of skin… whether rejected or ridiculed or some other means of communal castration, no matter how small or large any difference or the bullying or any consequence thereof be; the complete eradication of prejudice will remain a centuries old vicarious plague spurred from societal statistical stigmatic stigma, hysterically injected into the ill-reputed frail failing intellect of the majority who damningly dare to declare what differentiates from the norm. For example; I recently read about a son spurned by his own flesh and blood, “a vicious parent shaming still its child”1. ‘*Revolted by his father’s injustice’, the son left home at an all to early age, set upon a journey to prove or find his roots. Regrettably; during his mission, he was essentially met with a series of harsh condemnations. Ultimately; the son becomes consumed with self-delusion and an insatiable appetite for revenge to be inflicted upon those who once dared to flaunt their popularity, while others refused to embrace his uniqueness cloaked in natural flaws.
Fortunately "2the pen is mightier than the sword", so he merely immerses himself into his literary work. At last the world is his stage and he could not have chosen a better place. For whom among us has not been psychologically moved or entertained by words upon a page. Or our attention drawn to a character in a play, opera, movie, or a mere sit-com? And so with pen and paper the son makes his plight known for others to read then mourn, scorn, ponder, or wonder. Except to him, his anguish was the worse of anyone. Nonetheless; in due course the son grew into his own isolated culture rejected existence. After some time; a Woman professed, “*Evidently God has made us for each another! I am like you…” Soon afterwards the son married her, asserting; “*Blessed be the sorrows I have borne… Heaven was keeping such unhoped consolation in reserve! Until today I feared myself doomed to eternal singleness and to tell you the truth it was a heavy burden to bear”. Though; had he truly loved her for herself and not out of a seemingly Narcissist reflection of himself; then when her true colors came beautifully shining through, he would not have (for shame or other matters) discarded her much as he had been cast off by the population. Yet he did flee from her side; “*to abandon the career of literature, to escape into the desert and if possible shun for ever after the sight of living creatures. To seek, indeed, like Alceste”. Oh but as fate or merely an ill-fated wind would have it; the son landed not far from where as a child he had begun his journey away from his parents home. I surmise that perhaps feeling like the odd man out, surrounded once again by the publicly accepted; here in this familiar place is where he may have learnt the greatest lesson of all, which is; nothing in life is ever as it seems.
Every part I read about the spurned son seemed a humanistic enough story plot, the emotional afflict of discrimination, a temporary successive solution, love, loss, lessons learnt… except this is a tale of the feather type. Written in 1842 by Alfred de Musset; whence combining a vast array of birds with a stylish flare, a story takes flight. Amid the author’s intertwined unraveling assemblage of vividly artistically painted printed words, emerges a subtle view about a struggle with the centuries old trials and tribulations of the societal injected statistical stigmatic stigma, known as prejudice. “^How glorious it is and also how painful to be an exception”.
I watched the movie, Shattered starring Pierce Brosnan, Maria Bello, and Gerard Butler. The movie is based around the quote, “Who breaks a butterfly upon a wheel” found in the literary work of 1735, An Epistle to Dr Arbuthnot written by Alexander Pope. The excerpt has been drawn on by many People throughout the years. And different meanings of the expression have been included in music such as that by The Mission whom recorded a track titled Butterfly on a Wheel. Basically the phrase means, “putting massive effort into achieving something minor or unimportant”.
I think the quote “Who breaks a butterfly upon a wheel” has a lot of significance to offer our World today and is a great thought for ..2020... To often criminals break a butterfly upon a wheel leaving innocent victims to suffer the consequences of another’s irreparable actions. To many Soldiers are sent to fight a War that has largely lost its’ main purpose. Leaving our Men and Women to flap their wings in a territory that seemingly lacks the ability to act – let alone react – as civilized human beings who have been given the opportunity to rise above their once dictated brainwashed sadistic antics. Meanwhile; our own Country continues to lack massive and important measures to securely prevent any future potential terrorism violence nationally. Global Warming is given verbal band aides of decorated hope while sufficient funds are disbursed into other wheels of less importance.
Environmentally speaking, the butterfly effect is a phrase that “refers to the idea that a butterfly's wings might create tiny changes in the atmosphere that ultimately cause a tornado to appear (or for that matter, prevent a tornado from appearing). The flapping wing represents a small change in the initial condition of the system, which causes a chain of events leading to large-scale phenomena.” Let us no longer wonder, “had the butterfly not flapped its wings, the trajectory of the system might have been vastly different." Perhaps instead; it is time that we take back the wheel and steer our own wings, promoting positive change throughout the World toward Peace. For even the smallest of efforts can make a difference collectively. Be this by beginning such in our own home, community, political stance, etc. Hence, let they “Who breaks a butterfly upon a wheel”, know not their abuse of power but the willpower of Humankind.
ndpthepoetress: "The Tell-Tale Heart by Edgar Allan Poe is about an evil eye, dismemberment, and the repercussions of guilt. What more could a reader ask for! A seemingly short tale with enthralling details, but with an abrupt ending. Still in-between the lines one can perhaps visualize how some people fixate on a person’s flaws instead of their overall significance as a human being. And so the story begins, such imperfection gradually converts into an obsession. The male perpetrator could have only taken that which disturbed him the most. His method of choice however contemplated primarily on the breath of life, possibly giving the readers a clue to the frame of this killer’s own psyche at the time. Hence; the subsequent anatomization, may have been more of a means to prove his own self bloody-right than the ascribed reason. However; he was about to learn that all human life does have value. For guilt has a way of eating into the brain. There truth echoes, beckoning to be heard. Such resonance then can impel a sane man mad while plummeting a supposedly mad man even further into the depths of insanity. And so it is with The Tell-Tale Heart by Edgar Allan Poe":
In the cloak of darkness the heart pounded detrimentally inside her chest, as if insistent on immediate release; while perspiration dripped from numerous sweat glands she never knew her flesh had. Suddenly, the body she was hauling tumbled to the ground and descended along a steep hill. Panicky, she ran toward the already rotting carcass. In the hurried course her high heels broke as she toppled onto the mossy wet leafed ground, tasting dirt from her moist glossy lips. Her nose was within a few inches of the cadaver, the stench reeked with a combination of dumpster garbage and human sewage waste. Sickeningly nauseated she some how managed to rise, brushing the earths remnants from herself with her now bloodily scratched hands. Then, as if without any forethought whatsoever; she grasped the stiff body and lugged it toward a nearby river bank. Briefly, as if to catch a breath; she sat on the moist ground surrounded by the night. Her fleeting thoughts interrupted abruptly to realize she had not brought a shovel. Frantically she looked around in the moonlight. Broken twigs were scattered amidst the thickening, as she hurriedly threw them aside to at last find a short broken, rigid tree limb. She began to dig furiously right there beneath her feet, until the depth was sufficient. By now the crack of dawn was awakening, worn out she clasped the foul body, dragging it inside the hole. Her bare, scuffed raw hands clumping dirt rapidly over the grave. Content with her undertaking, she staggered toward the river. Achingly she knelt down to fling the icy water onto herself, simultaneously seeming to cleanse some of the filth from her skin and mind. Exhausted, she began the journey toward the hill top where her car was parked. Finally she arrived; fumbling with keys until the door unlocked, she climbed inside. Idle, hands on the wheel; she reflected on the nights’ escapade. If only someone had driven a little slower, perhaps none of this would have happened. Or if someone merely attended to the matter themselves when the incident occurred, than maybe she would not had to taken care of the dreadful situation herself. Still trembling; she shifts her car into drive and pulls onto the blackened road. The muddy rear frame of her car had only one bumper sticker visible: God Bless the animals that cross to and fro, for they know not which way to go.
I often believe that life has a way of presenting circumstances in our lives as a method of reminding us about lessons yet to be learnt or merely fragmentary reflections of current events. And so such began for me, my pet Gnat. Admittedly; there were several matters bugging me recently, ordeals seemingly beyond my control. And there, every time I came home – to greet me was The Gnat. Persistently pesky little bugger, reluctant to die. Never once did it try to flight upon my food, as if to contentedly fulfill its’ own needs. Instead, this Gnat would seemingly sneak from its’ hidden abode, explicitly when my eyes were fixated else where in deep thought; than zoom! Zoom, whoosh, whiz repeatedly; as I tried in accordance, only to unsuccessfully squish it with my hand or paper. Until at last this became liken a game between us of - dash, clasp, miss. Okay maybe I am taking this a wee far by my next train of thought, however; I swear this ruthless pest would accompany me at work in the good olde days. In the building at my place of employment, we seldom get pestered by the ‘real insects'. It’s not like we have flyswatter decors hanging about in all confined cubicles. No! Yet there ‘it’ was, The Gnat! And so Whoosh, slap, miss! Like a fool whom never learns from mistakes; I continued to take the hurtle bait, only to constantly get the same results - missed! Blasted rascal! Ok, if this pest was not the same from my home, than please explain how one day the annoyer was in my car, when I got off work! The Gnat – there to greet me in my auto, as if waiting for a free ride home from ‘its’ weary day of play. Ok I hear you. Gnats are massively every where! I have finally lost it. I am bugging out! This Gnat has ultimately succeeded - if only to drive me batty! Well today, or maybe it has been a few days now, anyhow; I am sadden to say, I lost my Pesky pet. No, I did not kill The Gnat. I recon ‘it’ has gone to pester someone else or has died of starvation – somewhere between my home and the open road. Or at worse, has become someones’ windshield muck. Just, I’m certain The Gnat did not leave of its own accord; as there are still plenty of recent tribulations tugging at my heart strings and playing intensely on my mind. Yet, sadly gone is The Gnat. Now I can’t help but wonder if I had ever succeeded in squishing ‘it’, would I have felt relieved or remorse. Perhaps we all need such a Pest, I mean Pet in our lives at times. Something tiny, requiring minimal upkeep; just something small enough to keep the mind occupied on other things, if but for a minute - so that the raw obvious doesn’t continuously eat us alive from the inside out, like an introverted vulture. Therefore; here’s wishing Gnats in your life! May you go batty as bed bugs, if but for a fleeting moment! Zoom, whoosh, whiz!
Dragonball Z - Eating Me Away
SKILLET
"Eating Me Away"
It's eating me away
I said to God
It's rotting in my mind
It's like a cancer
Is there anything, anything at all to numb the nothingness
I need a reason to breathe
It's eating me away
Yeah, yeah....
It's eating me away
It nibbles at my brain
The question of my existence
And the matter of pain
I shake my fist, I shake my fist
At the cosmos and my insignificance
I need a reason to breathe
It's eating me away
[CHORUS:]
Save me from my rage
And my humanity
I'm more nothing than being
Is this my legacy
Feel it eating me away
Yeah, yeah.....
All that I am, all that I want, all that I lack
Come on and save me
All that I am, all that I want, all that I lack
Come on and save me
[CHORUS]
All that I am, all that I want, all that I lack
Come on and save me
All that I am, all that I want, all that I lack
Come on and save me
Lo and behold; what hath I done to thee Universe to deserve such treacheries! I go to do laundry, courtesy of my Sister. I see an empty large Arm & Hammer laundry detergent jug, so I grab the smaller container in front of it; same brand Arm & Hammer. Began my laundry, then later noticed on the shelf is a full jug of laundry detergent. Perplexed; I read the smaller container, only to realize I am washing my clothes in RUG cleaner! Arm & Hammer plus Oxi Clean Stain Remover! With visions of my clothes being eaten by this strong stuff or chemically spotted, I calculated the repercussions of my actions in having to replace my clothes! Nothing I could do but wait.
Whilst fretting; I proceeded to vacuum my car, only to notice the hose was leaving black streaks on my car seats and my hands. Omgosh, I was using their outdoor grill vacuum cleaner! Now I really need the Carpet cleaner!
Meanwhile; the moment of truth has arrived, the washer is silent; as if pausing in a moment of prayer with me. I slowly open the washer lid...slowly....Yay; all is well and good; until while spraying Febreze, I realized in actuality and I kid you not, I went from praying to 's'praying freakin' Windex on my clothes!
Now my clothes are as clean as a rug, shiny as glass, and I can slither into my car seats!
Oh wait....my day just got better, NOT! Speaking of slithering, there is a flippin' swirling noise in my room JUST NOW; oh guess what it is! A lizard.....with a frantic crazy looking, suddenly an instant Ninja woman scrambling to open the door to set it free....run Lizzy the Lizard....'run as fast as you can'....away from ME! Success! Lizard🦎is free OUTDOORS! And BREATHEeeee...
All this before 🕙10a.m. today does not include the other day's, escapade! I was at work, parked in my usual spot waiting to go into work. Heard a thump; I thought on my car roof, thought it was squirrels, but got out and omGGGGG over 50 caterpillar looking things, BIG; were all around my car on the pavement. I looked and on my front engine top were splotches of grayish red globs; like something from the tree dropped, a nest of 'what the heck were these creepy-crawlies'! They were hard as with a stick, I removed some from my car than quickly ran to park elsewhere; in fear of some or more having already gotten in my car....creepy!!!!!
Yes, I only got one picture to prove this because there was NO way I was going to stand amidst the eerie army to capture the full effect! The sound in the below video, if it works; is scary enough! Sounds like, 'Let's kill her'!
