Friendship

To date, this Blog has presented imaginative control, added some humor to every day chores, and punned around with words on subjects from the Blues to Toast. This is because many musical compositions, songs, poems… have various articulated sentiments. Therefore; today I would like to talk about admiration. For everybody, undoubtedly there is someone to admire; rather this person be an Athlete, a Singer, an Author, or yourself. Likewise; you are tremendously Blessed - if the individual you have a high regard for, is also a Friend. For:

It can never be bought or borrowed or sold
A gift to be cherished,
True friendship is a treasure beyond compare
~author unknown


I am grateful to have this in my life. His name is D. G. Age to date, 75. Children: None. Race – irrelevant. His humor - a bonus! For example, he would take a ‘Beware of DOG’ sign and cross out the O. Yea, Beware of D. G.; Mister Lamb who would generously give anyone the wool from his last sweater.

In addition to Admiration, Friendship – if we are fortunate; into most hearts, there happens a ‘Once Upon a Time’, one True Love. And so it was for D. G. Him of youth, whence his hair glistened with color. The luck lady, bursting with youthful potentials. Though sadly; before womanhood could fully blossom or age naturally dye the hair, she died in a car crash. Understandably; D. G. would never love another, as he loved her. Later, various relationships came – went for him. Once a Girlfriend gave D. G. an alternative, ‘either your dogs go or I’. To date; D. G. remains a happily devoted Bachelor, always seen with a dog. The animal type that is, mutty and raggedy as himself. For many a day, D. G. will not a shave or bathe. His age now has turned those days into weeks.

As his Friend, I use to try and at least help keep his place clean. That was until, the fleas and roaches won. D. G. would bomb, spray… still the creepy crawlers sustained. Having either became insecticide resistant or fervent. Might this be from the steady crumbs, left out food, unkempt- unwashed pets…? D. G. consistently, would not clean up! Hello, even Bachelors can utilize a broom and soap.

Over the years; I naturally worried about his frail, slowly aging self. It had been nearly 25 years since he last agreed to visit a Doctor. For that reason; betweenst our phone calls, I periodically stopped by to check on D. G. There he was – characteristically unshaven, grubby. The usual odor from his residence reeked with extreme fetid smells. This day he sat, flicking some cockroaches inside an encrusted soup can. Had these infectious insects become his Friends? Ultimately I realized, D. G. was beyond help. For, “One can not help those whom do not want help”. ‘One can’t help those whom won’t help themselves first’. Nonetheless, my concern for him consumed my imagination. Fear, learning he died alone, roaches feasting on his remains. Like the horror story we hear about the Old Lady with numerous cats. She died alone, her carcass a banquet for the felines.

Over the years, no one could convince D. G. to improve himself or his residential conditions. Now he is greatly older and often I want to call the ‘Elderly Abuse line. Report him for ill-treatment of self. By chance, this year the health department intervened. D. G. was evicted from the rented dwelling. Sadly, he chose to move into a run–down, moreover crime ridden neighborhood. (Whose population will certainly intensify for lack of roach motels). Of course his dog resides with him! In fact, I spoke to D. G. the other day; asked why he didn’t enter an ‘Assisted Living’ place as we discussed. His answer, “I may be old, but I’m not stupid”. His new Neighbors are caring. However they as well; can not talk, hard-headed D. G. into going to a Doctor. Soon to be 76, trouble walking, blind in one eye, a hack- cough, D. G. has the nerve to tell me he is having trouble holding his urine.

Nevertheless; he is a person to be admired. Aside from his humor, despite his unhygienic ethics, there is a man with compelling principles. Values he nonchalantly, taught me. Standards that continue to guide me, like a Lighthouse in the dark. A constant compass point in my life. Many of us have at least one regret, we wish we could back and change. For D. G., his remorse came during his teenage time. At the beach - underneath a viaduct he strolled. Where two youngsters were raping a 16 year old, wheel chaired girl from his school. D. G. said he went initially to help her. Instead, in the process he got excited. End of story. Kids will be kids, has never been his slogan or excuse. The essential factor prevails; D. G. is genuinely remorseful for his involvement. While on the subject, some reason or the other; I asked D. G. his opinion concerning molestation. To this day, I clearly recall what he said; “Child molesters steal fruit before ripeness, stripping more than the flesh, they forever shred their victims childhood.”


The finest lesson I gather from D. G. is ‘the moment of truth’. He told how during his early years of bar hopping, while sitting on a bar stool - a voice inside him spoke, “You can either sit here until you become an alcoholic or you can get up, do something with your life”. D. G. has not been in a bar since. Most people see pink elephants, D. G. heard a voice. This voice he says is the moment of truth that speaks to everyone sometime in their life. You can listen to the voice or do nothing.

Yes, most people admire someone. However; if that person is additionally your Friend, wow! What a gem, what a treasure. For me, that person is D. G. ‘Warts and all’; nevertheless to me, he is a person to be admired, he is a Friend. And yes, I am Blessed to know him.

*Remember, you can comment anonymously; after all I go by the name Nom de plume ‘The Poetress’. Sure we ask for that crazy verification to be typed in, but that’s just to keep the ‘tin man’ away. So:

Whom do you admire? Is that person a Friend? What is your worst regret?